Pigskin Pontification

Questions…

Life is filled with many of them. Where am I? How did I get here? Where am I going? How did I end up with this tattoo on my ? What was her/his name again? Did you know chicken bones could be that crunchy?

I thought I’d deliver my annual Pigskin Pool Pontification with some pertinent questions

Such as: What time is it?

Simple question that all of us can answer, but how you answer it really depends on so many things.

For some its time to go back to school, for others the end of a long summer vacation, and for some, time to celebrate Olympic Gold success.

Ah… success.

The undeniable, enviable joy of winning it all and proving all the doubters and unbelievers wrong is so, so sweet.

For all of us the answer to what time it is, is really easy… its time for football. Time for another year of hope for both our teams (some realized last year, heh, and wanting a repeat) and for our chances to be crowned Pigskin Pool Champion. A time we all look forward to.

How about this question:

Do you know what Resiliency means?

Who Are We?

We

Are

The New York Giants

(I love that Super Bowl Intro so I had to include it)

Here's another question:

Y sO seRIoUs?

The Big Blue Knight

The Lombardi Grail, the greatest treasure in all of Gotham, was returned to its rightful place by Eli "The Bat" Manning and his Big Blue Justice League when they defeated the Legion of "almost" Perfect Doom in a historic battle six months ago. All seemed right for a time and the World Champions were content. But then Jerry-me "two-face" Shockey decided he no longer wished to be a part of the Big Blue Justice League and departed for a land full of saints. Shortly thereafter more trouble followed as Osi "the Chief" took a grievous wound in a sparring match with Brett "the Gangrene Lantern" Favre and will be out of commission for a whole year (sh*t)!!

It was with little surprise that soon in the night shrouded skies above Gotham the Big Blue Signal could be seen. Answering the call of Tom "Commissioner" Coughlin, The MVP Caped Crusader soon found out that the Big Blue Justice League's eternal nemesis, the cowjokers, led by the criminal minimal-mind Jerry "The Ego" Jones were intent on stealing The Lombardi Grail without even fighting for it. In fact, the cowjokers, despite being unable to win a significant battle in the last dozen years or so, had somehow managed to hypnotize all media throughout the land into believing they were the best, better even than the Big Blue Justice League who had soundly trounced them when it mattered most. Soon "The Ego" planned on sending his minions, Waddle "the whining penguin" Phillips and Tony "no playoff wins" Romo along with his sidekick Crying In His Popcorn 2 out from their foul headquarters, the land of Dallas, with mayhem in their minds.

Can Eli "The Bat" Manning, along with other heroes of the Big Blue Justice League, such as Kevin The Big Bossman, Justin Tuck You, Antonio "horn blower" Pierce, Brandon "play clock crusher" Jacobs, and "Well Dressed" Amani Toomer stop the cowjokers dastardly plan? Can they stop other villains from stealing the Lombardi Grail in the coming year? Villains such as "The Riddler" Soupy McNabb or Mr. FreeZorn and his group of cross dressing deadskins? Tune in on September 4 and find out… same "Bat" Manning time, same "Bat" Manning channel.

And be sure to tune in two months from now when Plaxico "mo' money" Burress returns to his former home with the Big Blue Justice League to battle a gang of black and gold vigilantes. It will be a fight talked about for ages to come… *ahem* or until they battle again.

Anyway, lets wrap this up with a genuine and completely serious question shall we?

And the final question you’ve all been waiting for:

Just tell us your team’s name. (not really a question but I get it)

Once again, my name comes from the summer time spent in Lakeside

I debated using a name like… chicken bone or bone cruncher or drinking contest or RISK victor or something else but then it struck me. Something I read made me realize I had accomplished something almost beyond comprehension, something mind-boggling and truly worthy of being my name for this year’s Pigskin Pool.

My name shall be:

NotPictured

For a record third year in a row, amazingly, I managed the incredible feat of not being pictured in the paper for the 4th of July parade. Despite switching sides with Matt, despite everyone else being pictured, despite being on the front end of the mammoth flag, and despite not caring until this point… I still managed to not be pictured in the Lakesider and therefore I have chosen this name in recognition of this crowning achievement. Much like a high school yearbook picture when the student is absent or misses the photo session, I am NotPictured.

I’d like to take the time to thank the Lakesider photographers who covered the parade for the last three years, as I really had little to do with it beyond choosing the correct side to carry the flag. Excellent work team! Lets do it again next year! I got the three-peat, I want the 4-peat!

As always, thanks for reading. I hope you found it moderately entertaining. Good luck to you all in the pool and your teams in the coming season.